Thursday, February 26, 2015

review || THE REALITY O

The Reality O Banner 

Today is the release day launch for Candy Sloane's The Reality O. I am so excited to share this erotic comedy with y'all. Candy is sharing an excerpt with us today, so be sure to check out all the info!!!


The Reality O by Candy Sloane

Publisher: Lisa Burstein (2/23/2015)
Genre: Erotic Comedy
Source: InkSlinger PR
Purchase links || amazon | bn || add to goodreads

Rating: ★★★★1/2

Fifteen Contestants, Twelve Episodes & One Very Big O 

When my best friend Allie posted about my need for an inaugural O on a prominent dating website it was meant to be a joke. A joke she was supposed to delete. But her post started an internet and media frenzy and, when I was offered fifty thousand dollars to star in my own reality competition show, I had no choice but to say yes. The Orgasm Virgin was supposed to help me meet a carnal companion who could finally bring me to climax. Unfortunately, the one person I want to win the undying allegiance of my, well, you know, can’t be in the running at all. Now in an L.A. mansion with fifteen very persuasive contestants vying for my attention and one undeniably sexy Production Assistant secretly getting it all the word ACTION has a whole new meaning… 

Candy Sloane is an erotica author and the fictional creation of Lisa Burstein from the New Adult novel Sneaking Candy. The Orgasm Virgin is her debut novel. 

Author's Note: This book is about sex. There are men kissing women, women kissing women, and men kissing lady parts. It is not meant for readers under eighteen, or my mother.


Candy Sloane Bio: Candy Sloane is an erotic romance author and the fictional creation of Lisa Burstein from the New Adult Novel Sneaking Candy. The Reality O is her debut novel.   Lisa Burstein is the author of the Young Adult Novels: Pretty Amy and Dear Cassie, and the New Adult Novels & Novellas: Sneaking Candy, The Next Forever, The Possibility of Us, and Again. She lives in Portland, Oregon with her very patient husband, a neurotic dog and two cats.

Website | Twitter | Facebook | GoodReads

{ exclusive excerpt } .

All of a sudden I felt a hand sliding up my leg from under the table. My body tensed and I screamed.

“Try to stay quiet,” Scott whispered into the receiver in my ear. “It’s me. I thought we could have a little alone time. Tell them you spilled water on yourself.”

Scott was under the table? Who was manning the camera? What if someone noticed?

“Chris, you okay?” Allie asked.

“Answer her,” he whispered against my knee.

“Yeah, just spilled my water,” I replied, spilling it for proof. Unfortunately I couldn’t see and it went all over me. It was fine, at least now every part of me was wet.

“Garrett is watching the feed, but I have the shot set from the tablecloth up. If we get caught, I’m screwed, but I couldn’t help myself. You make me wild and reckless,” he whispered.

A waiter came up behind me and handed me a napkin and a new glass.

“Your dress was so tight I was pretty sure you couldn’t be wearing any panties,” Scott said into my ear.

Damn, in addition to Scott’s many other talents, I guess he was also a panty psychic.

“The thought of you without panties made me so crazy I had to know.” He slipped his head under my dress and between my legs, laying small kisses along my upper thighs. “Glad to see I was right,” he crooned, starting to go at me with his tongue.

Well, who needs an appetizer?

“It wasn’t fair that you were the only one tasting something amazing tonight,” he whispered into my receiver “Stay quiet, stay hot.”

I sipped at my replaced water, or attempted to.

I listened as the waiter described the next course: grilled endive and calamari, but, with Scott’s tongue working me over, all I could taste was metal. My heart felt like it was going to fly out of my chest—it was impossible to keep still. I wanted to rock against him, to moan, to tell him I liked it, hell, I fucking loved it, but I knew I had to stay totally motionless, totally silent. It was like his mouth was a heat source, and I was trying to keep from boiling over, when the whole point was boiling over.

“What do you think, Chris?” my best friend Allie asked.

“I think…” My words were labored. Scott didn’t even stop, if anything, he went faster like he wanted me to respond with my opinion of what he was doing to me. I could feel him stroking me with his thick, wet tongue.

“It’s amazing, ahhh…”

Scott stopped.

“Stay quiet if you want me to be able to finish you off,” he whispered into my ear piece.

“Amazing, ah-mazing. Sorry,” I said, trying to recover, “I’ve just never tasted anything so good.”

I definitely wanted Scott to be able to finish me off. I wanted it more than anything. I saw the release his tongue offered like a light at the end of all this darkness, a blinding, stupefying light.

“It’s okay,” Allie said. “I wouldn’t scream out its name in bed or anything.”

Scott, I screamed in my head, because I would scream out his name in bed. I wanted to scream it out now, to beg him to continue. Scott, make me come the way only you can.

“Good girl,” Scott whispered, going right back to licking me like mad. A heat bloomed up from my core. I steadied myself against the table with both hands. “You taste so good,” Scott hummed. “Come for me.” I bit the inside of my lip and the tang of blood hit my tongue, the pain matched only by the pleasure I couldn’t show.

He went at me harder. My orgasm started to escalate, a deluge of burns being doused, Scott’s tongue igniting a flame that my willing body flooded out. My insides convulsed like they were clapping for him. All I could do was hold on tight and enjoy the ride, and I did again and again.

{ review } .
I'm always slightly skeptical when picking up a book that states it's a rom-com... I think it's much more difficult to get comedy across in written word than it is in movie form. It's like when you're texting someone -- so easy to mistake the emotion for something it isn't.

I thought this book was quirky. I didn't quite laugh-out-loud like I'd expect to with a comedy, but I certainly was grinning.

...I also turned beet red when my boss's boss looked over my shoulder while I was penning away at Starbucks (the second job...) and 'orgasm' was all over my computer screen. 


This book starts by way of Chris, in a drunken night, talking to her friend, Allie, about her lack of orgasms in her life. Oh, she's having sex... she's just not having orgasms. Allie then, good friend that she is, takes it upon herself to set her friend up with a Craigslist ad. Chris finds this out when she starts getting crude, suggestive phone calls and some... interesting photographs.

Demanding her friend to take it down, she learns that not only has the ad made Reddit... but it's also been reblogged way too many times to count. So of course, what better thing can happen than getting a tv show? Because you know those reality television producers... they'll take anything and make it into something.

In a terribly awkward situation, Chris ends up being attracted to the production assistant, Scott, and man, are the two of them hot together.

I did think that the contestants' 'name' was comical... I mean, c'mon, who goes on a show to be called a Gasm...? That made me roll my eyes the first few times, then chuckle the rest of the book.

I've rather enjoyed these reality-television-show books I've gotten my hands on as of late. Between this and MATCHED... they were good. You felt like you were watching the show.

Blogs Taking Part in the Release Day Launch
The Chiq Blog
G & Co. Book Blog
The Sassy Bookista
Unknown Book Reviews

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